This Hilarious Borderlands: The Pre-Sequel Review Will Have You In Stitches

We all love Mr. Torgue from Borderlands 2, don’t we? DON’T WE? Of course we do! Sorry for shouting. He’s a man who knows what he wants in the things that he likes: Explosions, explosions, and more explosions. Needless to say, he’s quite a character, and one of the funniest that Gearbox (presumably Anthony Burch, the series’ writer) managed to come up with in their foray into the world of Pandora.

Now, we don’t know whether ol’ Torgue will be back in Borderlands: The Pre-Sequel, but one player named Walex managed to take on his persona in the most hilarious way possible and write a review of the game on the Steam review page, giving it a hearty thumbs up, and leaving the following message: 

My initial impression of the Pre-Sequel was that it was simply a venture back into familiar and often exhausted territory with somehwhat limited innovation or creative inpu—[kzzht] 

THIS REVIEW HAS TOO MANY BIG WORDS! BOOOOOORING!

PROS:
LOW GRAVITY AERIAL COMBAT – INSERT YOUR OWN GUITAR SOLO SOUNDTRACK! [MEEDLYMEEDLEMEEDLYMOWWWWWWWW!]
BUTT SLAMS – YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TROUBLE WALKING TOMORROW!
LASERS – PEW PEW PEW PEW!!!
CRYO WEAPONS – POLAR VORTEX 2.0! BETTER THAN SLAG!
GRINDER – TURN JUNK GUNS INTO AWESOMESAUCE!
COMPELLING STORY – I LAUGHED SO HARD I POOPED A LITTLE!
CO-OP ROCKS! – PLAY WITH YOUR BROS OR PLAY WITH YOUR HOES!
NEW VAULT HUNTERS & SKILLS! – JUST TRY TO GET BORED!
CHALLENGING ENEMIES AND BOSES – THINK AND PLAN WHILE YOU RUN AND GUN!

CONS:
IF YOU DIDN'T LIKE BORDERLANDS 1 OR 2 QUESTS, YOU'RE GONNA HAVE A BAD TIME!
MISTER TORGUE IS *NOT* A PLAYABLE CHARACTER! (YET!)
SOME MISSIONS MIGHT SEEM REPETITIVE!
SOME MISSIONS MIGHT SEEM REPETITIVE!
NOT ENOUGH EXPLOSIONS!!!

SUMMARY:
A BIZILLION MORE NEW GUNS + NEW SETTING + NEW CHARACTERS = 8.4/10
IF MISTER TORGUE WAS A PLAYABLE CHARACTER = EXPLOOOOOOSIONNNNS/10

The game's out on the PC, by the way.