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Forbes Lets Stripper Review Hitman: Absolution, Hilarity Ensues

November 22, 2012 by Julie Horup

This is too good to be true.

Forbes has let a stripper review Hitman: Absolution. Yeah, let's just leave it at that for a minute.

Actually it's pretty hilarious despite not being a proper review. Author of the article Carol Pinchefsky played the game and described it as a "good game", but she was a bit disappointed with the appearance of the Saints – you know, the scantily clad nuns.

So obviously she decided to ask an actual stripper about the portrayal of the Saints, and whether or not it's actually plausible to be a stripper turned assassin.

Initially the stripper didn't understand why the Saints were called, well, the Saints.

"That doesn’t seem very plausible. I don’t understand why strippers would seriously become assassins, especially if they are Christians.  I mean…what kind of Christians are they? Are they Republicans?"

One of the stripper's comments were about the fact that the Saints wear high heels, because it's obviously not very practical.

"And if stiletto platforms gave you the advantage in warfare, how come our Marines and Navy SEALs don’t wear them?" solid question indeed.

The anonymous woman even suggested how to properly dress male assassins in the future.

"You never see male assassins in a thong with dollar bills hanging out," she said.

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