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Top 10 Worst Paid Mods for Skyrim on Steam Workshop

April 26, 2015 by Ian Miles Cheong

A fine selection of the worst paid mods on Steam Workshop for Skyrim.

Working together with Bethesda, Valve recently revealed a new service on Steam that allowed modders to sell their creations through the Steam Workshop. The service was not very well received for a number of reasons. Notably, the quality of the mods on sale were ether not very good, consisted of content that would have otherwise been distributed for free on the Skyrim Nexus, or used content stolen from other (free) mods that were already available. 

In this list, we take a look at the top 10 worst mods available on Steam that actually requires Skyrim players to pay for, and why we think they suck. 

10. Extra Apple

Price: $29.99
Link

This mod is a blatant attempt to cash in on the paid mod fiasco by adding an extra apple (hence the name) to the Bannered Mare tavern in Skyrim. Despite its steep cost and utterly pointless existence, there's little doubt that some people will spend money on the mod for a laugh or whatever it is rich people do. 

 

9. Bloody Glass Sword

Price: $0.25
Link

It's a red, reskinned version of the glass sword in the game. Abysmal. Serves as an example of the dozen or so other mods that are just like this. 

 

8. Lambda Locator

Price: $0.49
Link

This mod contains a two-step quest (yes, it's really that small) and Gordon Freeman's crowbar. On top of costing money, the mod doesn't even fit into Skyrim's lore and setting. 

 

7. Kill Jerlov

Price: $0.25
Link

This mod lets you kill Jerlov, the quest giver NPC that's normally invulnerable in Jimo's $0.50 terrible "Lambda Locator" mod. It's equally as pointless. 

 

6. Gaben's Fork

Price: $0.99
Link

This weapon is designed as a pointless tribute to Gabe Newell. Well, pointless insofar as it comes to enhancing your Skyrim experience. It serves only to enrich the creator's wallet. 

 

5. The Most Feminist Sarcophagus

Price: $0.49
Link

Guaranteed to annoy feminists. 

 

4. A Beautiful Man's Shield

Price: $0.99
Link

Enjoy a shield decorated with the gorgeous face of its creator. 

 

3. ULTRA REALISTIC HD BLUR SMOOTH GOLDEN WATER (PREMIUM) FIXED

Price: $2.49
Link

Replaces all the water in the game with piss. Because paid mods are piss. 

 

2. Rubbish!

Price: $2.49
Link

 

Another "joke" mod, like Extra Apple, the Rubbish! mod adds six new items to the Bannered Mare, scattering them in an equally pointless fashion. The items it throws about the floor are a blood rag, a soul gem shard, a plate, a burned book, a fork, and an empty bottle of skooma. 

1. [Early Access] The Sword

Price: $4.99
Link

Stands as a testament to the pointlessness of paid Skyrim mods. The description reads: "This sword is being released in Early Access and will involve a Kickstarter to improve the sword. If you're really looking forward to this sword, we will also have a Patreon set up soon for you to donate to!"

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