Divekick Roster Includes a Pregnant Skunk Bear

Also, fraternal twins called Dive and Kick.

For those of you who don't know, or maybe just forgot, Divekick is a fighting game for PS3, Vita, and PC that Mathew called “somewhat of a parody of the fighting game scene”, but it's not just a big joke. Silly as it might look on the surface, Divekick still has all the proper ingredients, including – as shown off on the PlayStation blog – a roster of playable characters.

First up, fraternal twins Dive and Kick. Dive is light-skinned, Kick is dark-skinned (which is actually totally possible with fraternal twins). Dive wants to perfect his diving technique, and Kick, well, wants to be the best kicker. Apparently, the two were sent by their mother to live with their Uncle Sensei in Bel Air “when trouble brewed at their local park”.

Other characters include: a short-looking fat guy in a red suit, whose name is given as Mr. N; a nameless (it says “Redacted”) and pregnant “Skunk Bear” who mutated after drinking some toxic waste and likes cigars; Kung Pao, the champion of a parallel dimension called Downworld; Dr. Victoria Shoals, who somehow managed to get a foot disease supposedly restricted to the feet of professional Divekickers on her face; Uncle Sensei himself, whose picture shows him wearing boots on his hands as well as his feet; and Alex Jefailey, who is said to dislike “Jefailure”.

Do these character bios make you more or less likely to play this game? Unfortunately, the game has no release date yet, so it'll probably be a while before you'll get a chance.